Why We Love Mistakes

"Confidence comes not from always being right

but from not fearing to be wrong."

– Peter T. McIntyre

Watch a child make their first mistake in our Dojo. What happens next tells you everything about where they are on their journey. Some freeze. Some look around, embarrassed, hoping nobody noticed. Some get frustrated. But in every one of them, at some point something shifts. They get up faster. They shake it off quicker. And eventually, they stop dreading mistakes altogether.

That's the moment confidence arrives.

Real, lasting confidence isn't built on winning streaks. It's built on the discovery that failure isn't fatal. That getting it wrong doesn't end the world. That you can fall down, look a little foolish, miss the mark entirely — and still stand back up and try again.

That discovery changes everything--it opens for them the whole world and all its possibilities. It's the player who's not afraid of missing that takes shots, and you gotta take the shot to make the shot. (No one has ever communicated this better than Education Guru Richard Lavoie in "When The Chips are Down" (you can hear it here at the :50 mark) -- it is required viewing for every Dojo instructor).

I've always believed that our most important mission -- not just Dojo Instructors but all of us parents, coaches, mentors and role models -- is leading our young people to that discovery. Every class, every drill, every time we ask a student to attempt something they're not yet good at, we get a chance to teach them to be okay with being wrong. To stay in the discomfort. To resist the urge to shrink--that the Black Belt is just a White Belt who never gave up.